Clay Studio

Japanese

My back pack(Jansport-navy blue) carries "The Invention of Solitude" by Paul Auster, "Dye the time blue" by Takagi Nobuko and "Glaze for Ceramic Art". The sentences byPaul Auster are 'cool', I mean literally 'cool'. They apparently sound indifferent buttouch my bunch of emotions comfortably. That's why I've been reading Austers, starting with "New York Trilogy".
I like stories by men and I also am interested in knowing how women are dealing with their preoccupation or conviction.I used to read Hikari Agata, but her writing conveys her overwhelming mental pain and put me in a bad fix. (I am sorry that we can no longer read her stories---she died in her late forties a couple of years ago.If her new story were published, I would ask her "How're you doing? Feeling a little lighter?" , turning her pages.)

So these days I've been carrying 'light' paperbacks, which I can read hanging to thestraps of trains, such as "Waiting to Exhale" by Terry McMillan and Toudou Shizuko.
I've started to play with clay, which I've always wanted to do for a long, long time.

One day I found a leaflet in the morning paper, saying that a person, ceramic artist, is opening a clay work class and I said to myself, "Oh, why not?" It's only fifteen minutes by bike and I spend the whole afternoon knocking, kneading, coiling or smoothing clay at his atelier on one of the weekends. That way my brain filled with stupid things will be emptied and I feel nice. This is why I carry a book on glaze,too.

You might have got an idea that I am enjoying my life 100% so far. However I have some problems too. For example, my pants have got a little loose again because ofthe stress I get from working at Yobikou, where I teach English grammar to students taking college entrance examinations next year. Jun says. " You are the type who seeks for stress when not even asked." That may be true.
It's no easy to work as a part time teacher. I wonder how many resumes I sent lastyear. I even bought a black pants suit for job interviews. I made it a rule to check want ads on the newspaper. However they wouldn't like to hire the experienced, to whom they have to pay more. Unfortunately I've never found ads saying 'Only over forties'.

Recently I read a new book by Murakami Haruki, "Yagate Kanashiki Gaikokugo." He writes about his life with his wife, who he married when they were still students. They ran a jazz coffee shop for seven years together, and then he started writing novels and short stories and they have lived on money he earns by writing for these twelve years. He writes, " In the beginning my wife complained about it, saying that it may be wrong to live on your income like this. I said, 'If you say so, it may be true, I think.' But I also think that it may be a fate of life, and so there would be nowonder if the opposite might have happened. This may be a problem which shouldrather be discussed before 'sexism'." Oh, I see. this way of thinking may help.
By the way, I sometimes feel that Murakami Haruki resembles my life partner, when I am reading his books. For example, both of them seem to live on the idea that I am I and others are others. I wish I could live that way.